When you fast, keep it private.

Matthew 6.16-18.

Believe it or don’t, some Evangelicals have no tradition of fasting. I run into ’em from time to time. When I talk fasting, they’re quick to reject it with “That’s an Old Testament thing” and “Jesus never told us to fast.”

True to both. In all of scripture, the LORD never commanded fasting; anyone who claims otherwise is taking the verses out of context. Fasting has always been voluntary; nobody has to fast. But certain churches do promote it. Might be a Daniel fast at the beginning of the year, a Lenten fast before Easter, an Advent fast before Christmas, a partisan fast before Election Day. But regardless of peer pressure, nobody has to fast. They’re voluntary customs. You can opt out. Don’t even need special permission from your clergy… although every year when St. Patrick’s Day falls in mid-Lent, many a Catholic who wants to get plowed will beg their bishop for a one-day pass.

The way Jesus talks in his Sermon on the Mount, he totally expects his followers to fast. Because his audience was full of Pharisees, whose custom was to fast twice a week. Jesus may not have expected them to keep fasting at that same rate—although according to the Didache, ancient Christians totally did. Didache 8.1 Either way Jesus did expect them—and us—to fast every once in a while.

Jesus himself fasted in the desert. While he was notorious for ignoring customary Pharisee fast days, he never did ban fasting. Never declared it a done-away-with custom. It’s in the Sermon on the Mount, remember? “When you fast” means you’re gonna fast. Sometimes.

If you don’t—if you never engage in any hardcore prayer practices, which is precisely what fasting is—don’t expect your relationship with God to grow as quickly as it does among Christians who do fast.

I know, I know: “But some of those ‘hardcore Christians’ are really hypocrites.” Yes they are. Jesus definitely forbids that sort of behavior. Really it’s his only rule about fasting: Don’t show off; don’t do it to look extra pious. Do it for real, and do it only for God.

Matthew 6.16-18

16“When you fast, don’t be

like the sad-looking hypocrites who conceal their faces

so they look to people like they’re fasting.

Amen! I promise you this

is the compensation they receive.

17You who fast:

Fix your hair and wash your face,

18so you don’t look to people like you’re fasting,

except to your Father in private.

And your Father, who sees what’s done in private,

will pay you back {in the open}.”

“In the open” in verse 18, same as verse 4, was added to the text in the fourth century, and found in the Codex Washingtonianus and the Textus Receptus. It’s not in the oldest copies. Yet since Jesus is described as bringing us our compensation at his return, Rv 22.12 he may very well repay us in the open.

Sad to say, a lot of fasting Christians don’t follow this rule; they totally let everyone know we’re fasting. Like our families and fellow Christians. And sometimes pagans, like coworkers and waiters and anybody whom we tell, “Oh I can’t eat that; I’m on a fast.” Well aren’t you the holy one.

Jesus wants us to keep our mouths shut about this. It’s nobody’s business we’re fasting. It’s a private matter, between us and God, and that’s it. Keep it as confidential as if you just soiled your pants: Tell nobody unless you absolutely have to. Got it?

Oh, I’m serious. So’s Jesus.

When we fast, we don’t eat; we pray. Instead of that mealtime, we’re talking with God.

So if you go to a restaurant with your friends, but you’re on a fast, and have to tell the waiter, “Just water, please,” and sit there sipping your water while everybody else in the room is eating a proper lunch… um, what’re you doing there? You’re supposed to be off by yourself, praying!

I’ve made this mistake myself. I didn’t understand the practice or the point of fasting; I just figured during the fast time I’d generally pray more often and more fervently. But all my friends were going to a restaurant after church, and I wanted to hang out with them, so I went. And just had water.

Just water? I didn’t want food? Was I feeling okay?

“I’m fasting,” I explained.

Nope, I didn’t keep it private. And I figured that was okay—I was being honest, right? What am I supposed to do, lie?

But properly, what I was supposed to do was not go to the restuarant. I was to pray, somewhere else.

What about fellowship? What about socializing with my Christian friends? Well it never occurred to me—and it’ll never occurs to lots of people who go to restaurants with their Christian friends and just sip water—is when we fast, we’re not just skipping a meal; we’re also skipping socialization. To the ancient Hebrews, same as the people of Jesus’s day, same as Christians of our day, mealtimes are social occasions. People back then didn’t just eat on the go; they stopped, sat down (or in Roman times, lay down), and ate together. And talked. Maybe dysfunctionally, but they talked. Socializing’s part of it. Always has been.

And when we fast, we’re not doing that. We’re going elsewhere. To pray. Not sit there and have someone ask you, “Aren’t you eating?”

Yeah, later they might ask, “Where were you?” At which point you can truthfully tell them, “Somewhere else.” Seldom will people press you further. Meanwhile you kept your fasting private. As you should.

(Now I should also remind you Christians aren’t to fast on feast days. Which means if you’re fasting after church, you’re probably doing it wrong: If Sunday is your Sabbath, eat! Go eat with your friends. Go ahead and socialize. Save your fast for the rest of the week; God wants you to take a break, so do.)

So most of the time when Christians go to restaurants and don’t eat, it’s because they don’t understand how fasting works. Nor the point. They don’t realize we’re meant to replace our mealtime with prayer time. (Nor realize we’re not to fast on Sabbath.) They don’t know any better, so don’t be hard on ’em: Cut ’em slack, and correct them gently.

Still, there are certain Christians who know exactly what they’re doing, and are being the very hypocrites Jesus told us not to be. These folks wanna be seen depriving themselves, seen not eating, and show off what good devout fasting Christians they are. “I’m setting a good example for others,” they might tell themselves. Which is rubbish; they’re totally playacting.

Don’t you do that. It does nothing for your prayer life. Like Jesus said, for such people “this is the compensation they receive.” Not spiritual growth. Not a closer relationship with God. That was never the point; appearances are.

Don’t even let ’em know you’re fasting.

Your fasting should be exactly like all your other prayers: Kept private. Kept between you and God. Kept secret. Don’t let anyone—or let only a very, very few trusted individuals—know what you’re up to.

I’ve heard various Christians say, “Well, we can make an exception for all-church fasts.” If everybody else in your church is fasting, and everybody knows there’s an all-church fast going on, they figure it’s totally fine to let slip we’re participating. And I respectfully disagree.

Remember, Jesus’s audiences had Pharisees in it, and Pharisees fasted every Monday and Thursday, without fail. And looked it, which was part of the problem. Now if you didn’t look it—if you fixed your hair and washed your face like Jesus instructs—would people know you were participating in the Monday and Thursday fasts? Maybe they would; nobody would be in the dining area during mealtimes. And maybe they wouldn’t notice.

But Jesus doesn’t want us to give ’em anything to notice. We’re to draw no attention whatsoever to something which is meant to be personal and private between us and our Father. Even if everybody’s doing it, and everybody knows everybody’s doing it, it’s still not their business. It’s only between us and our Father.

It’s not their business for a number of reasons. Primarily it’s because they’re not the fasting police! It’s not for them to pressure us: “You’re fasting, right? You should fast. Everybody else is. What, don’t you wanna grow closer to God?” And so forth. They really don’t understand this is a private matter… nor do they understand they’re not helping. They’re turning it into an obligation.

Immature Christians likewise don’t understand a fast is not a form of corporate worship. By corporate I mean something we Christians do together. Like sing together, pray together, do good deeds together… but we do not fast together. We might all be fasting at the same time, but this is still something we all do it individually.

Now, as part of our fast, we might gather for prayer instead of doing lunch. Okay; but that’s gathering for prayer. That’s not gathering to fast. And still, when we’re praying during our fast times, we’re meant to go off alone—to withdraw from others, same as we withdrew from food—and pray alone. Just the individual Christian and God.

Other forms of prayer groups are totally fine. Fasting groups are not. Because they all too quickly turn into groups where people start griping about how hungry they are. Instead of praying and seeking God, we’re feeling sorry for ourselves, and talking about how once this fast is over, we’re totally gonna eat our favorite things. I confess I’ve done this way too often. Don’t repeat my behavior.

Step away from your fellow Christians, step closer to your Father, and resist all the temptations to wail or brag about the situation. There will be many, and they will undermine your devotion. So keep it as private as you can.